so affictitious just got to the snow fight in LR for the first time…

i dont understand

shut up josh

chakravartin: YOOO SUBWAY SERIES COMING UP SOON. we gotta get our dick swinging on soon.






say it with me:

makeup is gender neutral

I whispered “makeup is gender neutral” out loud on the train and the guy next to me looked at me weird but then whispered “fuck yea” back


FINAL FANTASY XIII scenes [ 08/ ]



things i’m super tired of in creepypasta:

1) overdescribed shit. coelasquid already posted on this. you overexpose and remove all of the unknown by going into minute detail.

2) long skinny faceless monsters or any variation thereof. i am super done with reading ‘there was a long shadow in the doorway, human-shaped, but with long, unnaturally-” if that sentence isn’t finished off with ‘dicks’ my interest is officially and completely lost.

3) smiling, laughing, giggling, etc from the monsterthing. it’s always ‘it turned and smiled unusually wide, no human could look like that’ or ‘it started laughing hysterically’ or some shit.

4) doing shit that is inhumanly stupid. look, if you go wander off into an abandoned shack in the woods then it is your own stupid fault if you got eaten by the massive skinny bitch monster. if you see some goddamn weirdo in your yard in the dark, call the fucking police you dumbshit. i have yet to see a ritual worth doing because 99% of them are basically ‘if you do the slightest wrong thing you will die a horrible death five thousand times’ for a crappy payoff.

I’m gonna be honest I grew up in the forest and me and my pals would wander into abandoned shacks and weird little forest lean-tos, even crawl into foreclosed houses all the time. When I talk to people who grew up in other rural places they did the exact same thing. I mean, like, even just two or three years ago my dad and I went out on a canoe trip together looking for abandoned cabins to see what was left in them and scavenge stuff like 90’s Jurassic Park toys. I wouldn’t call approaching an abandoned shack “inhumanly stupid” because it’s a pretty normal thing for a person who doesn’t know they’re in a horror story to do.

That said, yeah, approaching the weird monster man hiding in the dark on your lawn without calling the cops, that’s pretty strange for someone who isn’t a very certain personality type (think that macho castle-defense homeowner type who sleeps with a gun under their pillow)

And yeah, man, I’ve only seen very few ritual stories that make sense, that’s one of my biggest pet peeves with those things, the carrot on the string at the end of it all has to be valuable enough to risk the ruination that comes from doing things wrong, or some step needs to be deceptively simple to make it seem attainable. I’ve seen people who completely forget that there needs to be a payoff even and the directions are just like “do these impossible steps and if you screw up you die, succeed and receive horrible unending torture”. It’s worth remembering these things were like the zygote that grew into what creepypasta is today.

Back in the day like eight or nine years ago, people would start “real world cheat” threads on /b/, that usually amounted to mundane directions that would lead you to something spooky. Like “turn on this specific unmarked intersection and follow the dirt road to a hotel, use this specific currency in the drink machine and hit the out-of-stock Pepsi button to receive an unlabeled can of human blood” or “go to this place at this certain time on this night, you’ll see an abandoned one story building, the door is unlocked, go inside and you’ll see stairs leading to a second story, the door at the top of the stairs is locked, but you’ll smell a distinct odor of raw meat and fresh bread”. Things that weren’t particularly useful or immediately dangerous, just strange, presented in a “go on try it, see for yourself” style. People escalated from those to more elaborate secrets, like the story about getting into the absinthe bar art gallery with paintings made of parts of dissected human bodies, and from there to “rituals” that mostly seem like a lot of work for nothing particularly helpful.

The Devil Game isn’t a bad one, it works because the risk is just talking to him longer than you’re supposed to or not appropriately protecting yourself, and gamble once you successfully get face to face with the devil is he asks you a question and if you answer correctly he’ll answer one for you. But he doesn’t tell you when you answer incorrectly, he’ll just answer your question with a lie. It’s a little long and trying very hard to sound informal, but it’s solid as far as being the kind of thing you could actually imagine people trying and succeeding at.

First inquisitor will be…

Reblog this for Qunari

Elf, DwarfHuman

“he inhaled his scent. he smelled of (ingredient 1), (ingredient 2) and something undefinable, that was uniquely (name of buttsex partner)”

every single fanfiction uploaded in the last two years oh my god  (via brood-of-froods)

lucy stillman got treated so bad that even her own dev team misinterpreted her


i found the exact moment when steve harvey’s soul collapsed



protect misinterpreted female characters at all costs

current status: physically upset about snow villiers

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